Women sleep with losers all the time...

...but rarely with guys that consider themselves losers.

And almost never with guys that they think are losers.

Women value confidence even if they have to give up something to get it.


(Not that I really know anything about women. Or confidence.)

I always thought that Canadians...

...were supposed to be polite and unassuming. But every spring, a bunch of Canadians come to the hotel on a golfing trip and they are--without exception--a bunch of overbearing jackasses.

Sometimes, all I want...

...is a chair to sit in and some space to stare into.

I've never actually been catatonic, but I've been close. Sometimes it doesn't sound like such a bad thing.

One thing I hate...

...is when people (or institutions) tell me I have to do something but don't tell me why. Whenever I hear that something is required, my first reaction is always, "Or what?"

Probably one reason my life is the amazing story of prosperity and success that it is.

Defenestration

I love that there's a word for throwing something (or someone) out of a window, and I love that it's such an arcane and obscure word that it's almost always easier to say "thrown out of a window.

So, what do you think they mean by this?

Do they mean victims or, you know, "connected"?

Whatever my other strengths

--and I probably have a few--death still terrifies me. I honestly don't know if that's a rational fear of the unknown, or an irrational superstition. But the fact that I'm going to die and that everyone I know or will ever know is going to die is almost more than I can stand to think about.

So, whenever possible, I try not to think about it.

I'm not a big believer in conspiracy theories...

...but no matter how ridiculous they might be, they all reflect a certain underlying truth: There are things going on in the world that you can't control; rich and powerful people are making decisions that affect your life without your knowledge or consent. You might end up losing your job or fighting in a war you don't understand and never know exactly how it happened or who decided it would happen.

I finally did the math...

...and figured that if I sleep eight hours a day, and I live to be 72, I will have spent 24 years of my life asleep. If I can get by with six hours of sleep and I live to be 72, I will only have spent 18 years of my life asleep. That's six extra years of consciousness, which seems pretty significant when you look at it like that.

But I'm not convinced that consciousness is absolutely the best part of being alive and I don' t think I could live to be 72 if I only got six hours of sleep at night--or that I would want to.

Surly Underlings in Girly Underthings

I don't really have anything to say on the subject: it's just some words that've been floating around in my head for the last day or so.

Consider it a form of Google abuse. The only place in the world where these words appear in exactly this order.